OUR SURVIVAL BRAIN- friend or foe?

Most people have witnessed an emotional melt down whether that be one of your own or that of another. Tantrums are a vivid example of emotional overload in action. However, not all intense emotional reactions result in tantrums but our lives do get hijacked and fixated at times especially when we want life to be different than it is; when we are reacting to our wants, fears or perceived threats to our well being. There is a perfectly reasonable explanation. Let’s have a look at our limbic brain system; our survival brain.

The limbic system is comprised of a group of complex interconnected structures that govern our emotional and behavioural responses. The amygdalae consist of a cluster of almond shaped cells located at the base of the brain. Each person has two of these cell groups, one on the right and one on the left. Within the limbic system, it is the amygdala which controls our emotional reactions to stress, preserves memories and attaches specific emotions to these memories. Consequently, a joyful experience would be imbued with a warm, fuzzy memory and a disastrous experience would bear the hall mark of dread. The amygdala also activates the fight or flight response. What makes the amygdala more amazing is that the fight or flight response is triggered without any initiative from us. It is an automatic response. When the amygdala senses danger, it signals our brain to pump stress hormones (adrenaline) preparing our body to either fight for survival or flee to safety.

For our early forebears, the fight or flight response was vital because it helped them react quickly to immediate physical danger thus ensuring survival. Nowadays, we are not usually in fear of wild animal attacks, however, our limbic brain is still on duty. These days, our fight or flight response tends to be triggered by psychological threats– pressures and stresses of modern day life, work and/or relationship problems. Common emotional triggers are fear, anger and aggression. These triggers can cause sudden and irrational reactions.

Daniel Coleman,(author of Emotional Intelligence- Why it can Matter More than IQ- 1995) calls a sudden and irrational reaction an amygdala hijack. This type of hijack occurs when our amygdala responds to a particular stressor, interpreting it as a physical threat and disabling our frontal lobes ( areas of the brain which regulate voluntary actions like reasoning, thinking, decision making, planning and movement). Irrational reactions have the potential to be extremely embarrassing. Whilst we are quite familiar with the fight or flight response, there was little said about the value we could access from our survival instincts and the positive effect they could bring to bear on our personal growth. What happened in our societal/ cultural development to bring our limbic responses into disrepute?

Our forebears have tried to understand the complexities of human behaviour and our place in the cosmos. Besides our physical existence, there seemed to be an awareness that there was a ‘greater reality’ or a spiritual dimension which would help humanity flourish; to discover its full potential. Ancient Greek philosophers like Socrates promoted values like truth, wisdom, justice, compassion and peace. Whilst teaching similar values, the Judeo- Christian philosophy also concerned itself with reforming our natural instincts. Unfortunately, that often meant the elimination or at best, the suppression of our so called ‘basic nature’ . Deemed detrimental to the soul, feelings of anger, want, envy or lack were judged and labelled as undesirable or bad. Our evolutionary pull towards awareness was a sharp contrast to our instinct for survival especially when there was cultural agreement about what constituted the development of awareness. We were taught to label ourselves as ‘bad’ when we were angry or disobedient or just didn’t measure up.

When we feel bad about aspects of ourselves, we don’t just stop at a label. Often we engage in quite corrosive criticism of our ‘badness’ in order to extinguish it from our psyche. But self judgement does not heal; does not develop self understanding or compassion and yet we persist with this type of self annihilation because we are conditioned that there is no other possibility. But there IS another possibility. Tara Brach says that if we were to respond to anger rather than react to it, anger becomes the path of loving ourselves into healing. It actually achieves that sought after purpose- the development of awareness and a connection to spirit.

The thing is that limbic energies (fear, frustration, anger etc) will keep turning up no matter what we do. THIS is IMPORTANT to UNDERSTAND. It is part of being human; of being alive. There is nothing inherently wrong with our raw emotions. How we respond to them is both our responsibility and our opportunity for growth. When limbic energies arise, Tara Bracht suggest that we slow down and become present (this means no delving into the past or flying into the future). This does not get rid of the emotion but stops us from being taken over by it. It means that the emotion can be present without any judgement on our part as to its value.

Be thankful. By being thankful we begin the transformation or integration of that emotion’s pure energy into our system. The aim is to shift our relationship with our limbic energies/emotions not eliminate them. Because we are so practised at labelling ourselves as inadequate, we have created a high tolerance for accommodating this raw emotion; in fact we often think that this is normal. Consequently, it takes practice to choose to stay present with something uncomfortable whilst having deep confidence that staying serves our awakening/ our healing. With practice, there is a deeper and deeper letting go of the stuff we’ve been running from. Surrendering any resistance to whatever is present feels like a risk because our whole life, up to that point, has been organised into avoiding these painful experiences and WE ARE SO-O-O GOOD AT IT. At first, opening up to these experiences might feel counter intuitive and very unsafe plus our limbic system quickly reminds us that when we are unsafe, ‘dying’ is a definite possibility. The trouble is that we don’t get the ‘dying’ message clearly enough for our logical brain to recognise the absurdity of it. All we feel is the need to escape or become defensive.

Tara Brach suggests that we develop a practice of investigating our limbic emotions with the “open mind of curiosity”. The bottom line is that this emotion has something to teach us and our job is to find a way to hear what it has to say. Some people find it helpful to give their limbic emotions an image. Tara tells the story about a woman who imagined her anger as a black wolf. This image helped her to relate to her anger and was surprised by the advice the ‘wolf’ imparted. When anger arose, she knew it was time to consult the wolf. The wolf would remind her to trust herself and not get lost in the minutia of life. Thus the purity of that raw limbic energy was channelled into a constructive force in that woman’s life. Tara reminds us that in the moments that we befriend our limbic emotions, and begin to align ourselves with life as it is, there is a lot more space, energy and tenderness available to us as our relationship with those basic survival emotions begins to change. Tara calls this change in attitude ‘tending and befriending”.

Let’s go back to Daniel Coleman. He also suggests that we can learn to respond differently to being over run by limbic emotions or being hijacked by the amygdala. He suggests that we slow down, breathe and remind ourselves that we are experiencing an automatic response. It is important to acknowledge our body’s reaction and how this makes us feel. We need to acknowledge that our reaction may not have been the most logical one. He also suggests that when we are calm, we spend time investigating our reaction and what activated it and consider some different responses; ones that are more thoughtful and rational. He claims that these steps allow our brain’s frontal lobes to take over from the ‘irrational’ amygdala.

Both Tara Brach and Daniel Coleman agree that dealing with the survival emotions of our limbic brain takes time and practice. They both acknowledge the need to accept and value the emotions that present themselves (Tara’s tend and befriend). Whilst Daniel Coleman links his approach to developing a more thoughtful and rational response by accessing the frontal lobes of our brain, Tara links hers to a greater awareness of who we are – an expanded version of ourselves. She suggests that we have connections to the “living web of life; the sense of the divine; our higher selves; the Divine Mother. She suggests that this ‘realm’ is both a source of support and solace in times of overwhelming emotions. However, she sounds a warning: whilst we may get support from ” the sense of the divine,” without doing the work of accommodating our limbic energies and learning from them, this may become yet another escape.

To conclude: we emerge into this life with primitive energies. Tara says, “It is a fact that every living form is designed to see itself as separate from the whole and to pursue survival and is energised by fear, wanting or lack.” But we also emerge with the desire to manifest our awakened heart/mind and that evolution is dependant on how we relate to the less mature parts of ourselves (our limbic caretakers).

That’s the work and it is often daunting but each break- through brings us closer to becoming more compassionate, loving and understanding towards ourselves and others.

Be kind to yourselves

Sources: Tara Brach: podcast- Loving ourselves into healing- part 1

Daniel Coleman- Emotional Intelligence- Why it can Matter More Than IQ- 1995